Form: Humor

(funny)

“I’m trapped here until I get some clothes.” – Roman Skaskiw

Invent your own story behind THAT quote……

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2cBwTe3g5cFavorite Prank Of The Year

(silly)

As my sisters will happily acknowledge, at length, with fish-tale exaggeration, at every opportunity, with gales of laughter, I am a terrible tease, and as a child I teased and tortured them no end.

(Rural life was boring. What can I say. And younger sisters are excellent toys. It would have saved them a lot of anxiety if we had had video games in the sixties and seventies.)

But I don’t remember thinking of this particular torture or I would have tried it. More likely, I did think of it, but I was afraid I might hurt them actually. Emotional distress and physical distress are different things. Not really keen on hurting.

Teasing though is just an art form. Like throwing snowballs at the guys four grades ahead of you from rooftops where they can’t see you. Or putting scotch tape between signs so that cars drive into it with a bang. Or hiding in the closet until your cousin falls asleep then making noises just soft enough to be unsure they’re real. Or drawing characters in the road with gasoline. and lighting them on fire as a group of cars approach. Or climbing telephone poles and teasing policemen. Or chalking your algebra professor’s chair. Or sneaking into a classroom and anonymously drawing enormous magic number diagrams on a chalkboard so that the teacher is too impressed to erase it. Or hiding one piece from your friend’s chess set in his coat pocket. Or you know…

Anyway. I couldn’t have gotten away doing this kind of thing to Jean, because she would have gotten mad. But Ellen, well, that would have been a lot of fun…

(I miss my family.)

Does anyone else lose a pair of glasses per quarter?

Sigh. I buy two to four pair at a time.

Elves. Must be elves.

FUNNY:

I thought I would share.

The government sued me for $1.2M

But it turns out that they owe me, with interest!!! LOL I knew it.

2009 – $36,020

2010 – $43,331

2011 – $53,835

2012 – $47,090

Total refunds due: $180,276

I can run software development in Kiev for an entire year on that much money. 🙂

I should have all my money back in week. 🙂

But I think that the hotel does not want me now. So that I must go. 🙁

Love you.

SHAVED MY BEARD : VERONICA WON”T KISS ME

(silly)

I do it once or twice a year, and it lasts for a couple of days. So, if I keep it like 2mm long it’s ok. Longer than that she complains that it hurts. And when I shave it off, she complains that I don’t look like the same man, and so she won’t kiss me.

I think it’s just that she doesn’t want to kiss me at all. lol

lol