( You know, when most of us see something well designed we ‘notice it’ and feel ‘pleasure’ in it. But we tend to ignore what is not well designed. We accommodate it. But some of us (aspies and ocd’s) don’t ever accommodate the imperfect. It’s more that we feel relaxation at the perfect, not pleasure. Instead we feel the absence of displeasure. I look at everything, and I see what’s ‘wrong’ with it – meaning asymmetric or atonal or disordered.
I look at the building next to me and I see that one of the windows is bricked in, and it ruins the aesthetic of an otherwise beautiful 19th century building. It bothers me that there are salmon curtains in the window of this other building. I notice that the lines of that car were a compromise not a solution. I notice that the brick joinery on the curb was done lazily. I notice facial asymmetries, walking, and body language patterns. And I notice all of it as constant unending stream. And worse I tend to see the whole history and future of these things at the same time as a rushing set of images. And yes it’s freaking annoying. But it’s also useful.
This ‘seeing the bad’ makes me ‘look for the good’. And I usually find some good to compliment in almost everyone. But, despite seeing a world of imperfect things, I don’t find it ‘dishonest’ to say ‘I like this person’, or ‘he is a good person’, and at the same time say ‘he’s terribly stupid in this way’ or ‘he has very bad taste in this context’. Any more than I notice my own facial asymmetries, my own ‘stiff’ body language, my own weakness in the left side, my own stupidities in one way or another. I can love my dog, my friends, my family, my mate and still know their failings. I don’t see a contradiction in any of that. It just is what it is.
What I have been told quite frequently here in Ukraine, is that it’s dishonest – lying – to seek the optimistic path even if I see all these negatives. And this is an interesting insight into the intuitionism and moralism of Ukrainians – and Russians – that we don’t experience in the west: we work with the good we have. We tolerate that which we can tolerate. We ignore what we can ignore. And we operate from an optimistic if not utopian set of judgements – or at least, some of us do. I certainly do. Because if I thought of or worried about the imperfections I would be incapable of action. Worse, if I was ‘honest’ in all that I SAW people would fucking hate me. lol. And neither they, nor I, would be better off. So, while germans are empirical, British are moral, and Americans are utopian, Ukrainians are intuitionistic, call themselves ‘honest’, and in fact, are not trustworthy whatsoever except to their closest friends. Russians are equally intuitionistic, but nihilistic, call themselves honest, and are only trustworthy if they have no other choice. And this is borne out in all the data on trustworthiness, language use in negotiations, and visible corruption.
Hence we must humor people from other cultures because as intuitionistic they cannot be reasoned with. )
Source date (UTC): 2016-05-05 08:22:00 UTC