Curt Doolittle shared a post.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-29 04:38:00 UTC
Curt Doolittle shared a post.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-29 04:38:00 UTC
DEALING WITH THE ALPHA MALE
h/t Don Finnegan
I liked this quite a bit and thought I’d save it. What’s missing is the fact that a woman helps an alpha avoid consideration of emotional biases so that he can ‘calculate’. And visa-versa. The best an assistant can do is to insulate you from emotional content, and let you do your job. She then adjusts the facts and communicates the facts. Whether people like things or not is irrelevant to him. That’s her job. That’s her specailzation just as ‘calculating’ is his job.
Protect him from emotional content that interferes with his thinking. Emotional constant is only important when it betrays a confidence, betrays loyalty, or violates an agreement.
Dealing With The Alpha Male
By Susan Dunn
The term comes from monkeydom – the dominant male in the hierarchy who basically runs things and gets what he wants. In the monkey troop, there’s only one and one of his privileges is he’s often the only one who gets to mate.
In a nutshell they’re domineering, intimidating, impatient with people and details, thrive on responsibility, driven, irascible, know (not “think”) they’re right, often left-brained, and difficult.
Is there an “alpha female”? Studies have shown that females are not as innately** threatening as males. Also, across-the-board, males test lower in empathy and social responsibility – two traits that contribute to this personality style. So, not really
**Tests for innateness mean it’s evident with newborns, and in every culture, therefore not something “learned”.
How do you cope with one? Here are some suggestions.
1. Take a stand.
You won’t get to hold it, but if you don’t, you’ll become irrelevant.
2. Learn their language.
This is helpful with anyone, learning how they speak, and essential with the alpha male. Listen to the alpha and parrot back, using his terminology. For instance, if you get an email saying, “You were wrong ,” you can reply, “How do I do this right ?”
3. Maintain your dignity and self-respect.
It may well be under assault, and it’s up to you. The alpha male isn’t looking out for you, your feelings, or sentiments, or often even your opinion. If you show he’s “getting to you,” you’ll likely get more of it. (To them it’s a show of “weakness”.) Learn to manage your nonverbal communication – facial expressions, position of hands, posture, etc.
4. Come in equipped with Emotional Intelligence.
You’re going to need it. They are results-driven, and this means they run rough-shod over people, whom they see as merely a means to their end. (You will be judged on how “useful” you are.) You will have to learn to protect yourself. Deal with the facts and don’t take it personally. If you look around, it was just “your turn,” that’s all. Don’t give up your Personal Power and fall into “hopeless and helpless.”
5. Right and wrong. (Shame and blame)
There’s likely to be a lot of discussion about who was “right” and who was “wrong.” If you made a mistake, say so up front. (Often it’s good to put as much in writing as you can about what you did, when, in case it comes up later and is subject to his “selective memory.”) If you did something because of lack of knowledge say, “I didn’t know that at the time.” Don’t apologize.
6. Eliminate the ordinary “fluff”.
Be analytical, logical and direct. Since they are relatively insensitive, direct comments you might make to someone else, will bounce right off their tough hide. Their ends justify any “means,” including disregard for others. They don’t respond well to “I’m sorry,” or “How are you feeling today?” They just don’t like it, that’s why.
7. If you’re sensitive, you may need to find somewhere else to be. Period.
To the average alpha male, you’re “a breathing body” and that’s about it. He may not even bother to learn your name as he barks orders.
8. Stay neutral and don’t admit to a weakness.
While it works with most people to say, “I’m learning this job and have a ways to go,” to an alpha male, this is like waving a red flag to a bull. Stick with details, “Yes, I see. It won’t happen again.” (Or say “Yes I hear you” or whatever your listening to his vocabulary has taught you.)
9. Avoid appearing (or being) submissive.
If you do, you’ll lose his respect. Don’t be intimidated by his anger. The basic reason is probably because it makes him feel good, so there’s not a thing you can do about it. More than any other type, don’t try to change him. It won’t work. (If you do try, get something like a 360 – evidence from everyone else is all he’ll believe.)
10. Don’t waste his time.
Which is most of the normal niceties and social amenities.
Susan Dunn, San Antonio, TX, USA
sdunn@susandunn.cc
http://www.susandunn.cc
Susan Dunn, MA, Psychology, Emotional Intelligence Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, Internet courses and ebooks around emotional intelligence for career, relationships, transitions, resilience, personal and professional development. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for free ezine.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-29 04:12:00 UTC
THINGS THAT GO BOOM IN THE NIGHT
Woke to a huge explosion last night that set off alarms all over the area. Deep, loud, high velocity. It sounded like a bomb. Not a backfire. I had immediate visions of rockets.
Turns out some kids made an ‘IED’ and set it off. And blew a hole in a wall somewhere nearby.
Kids. (Boys)
Endless fascination with things that go boom.
UPDATE (Note that the Roshen store is across the street from my apartment)
KIEV, May 29. An explosion has occurred in the Roshen store in Kiev’s Obolon district, no one was injured, Kiev police chief Alexander Tereschuk said. He contradicted the information received earlier that the shop had been shelled with a grenade launcher.
“According to our investigation, this can be regarded as hooliganism. There was a powder charge, but there are no debris, so it must have been a self-made explosive device. I refute the information about the store being shelled with a grenade launcher,” he told Ukraine’s public television.
Tereschuk noted that a terrorist attack was ruled out.
The law enforcement officials said the explosion had taken place on Thursday at about 23:00 local time. No one was injured as a result of the incident.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-29 03:07:00 UTC
PRIVILEGE (DISCOUNTS ON OPPORTUNITY COSTS) AS INFORMATION
—Hayek’s point about distributed knowledge applies to more than just economic issues. It also applies to social issues.—-
RE: http://ow.ly/Ln3uF
[W]hile, as I’ve written before, I agree with the general argument that women sense some things and men others (and progressives, libertarians and conservatives different things as well) I have a more complete theory of the inter-temporal division of perception, cognition, knowledge and labor (and one that eliminates equality, and monopoly decision making), there is a minor error in the logic of the first paragraph, and that is that it is irrelevant that we understand others – it is only relevant that we conduct exchanges with them.
Because their reaction to their senses are not accurate or ‘true’ in any meaningful sense other than as a reflection of the individual’s reproductive strategy – any more than any of the rest of our senses are all that accurate – they themselves are fragments.
This single insight is the principle cause of why democracy does not work, and the market does. The market allows us to cooperate on multitudinous means even if on disparate ends, with our successes and failures informing both us and others.
Whereas a monopoly government prevents us from learning anything of value, and the institutionalization of foolish policy by unexpriable law, and the accretion of bureaucratic self interests, prevents adaptation outside of catastrophic chains of failure.
In fact, monopoly government (monopoly production of commons by majority rule) promotes failure because it is precisely failed policy that permits the greatest rent seeking for all involved.
It is not that we should prohibit government (as Hayek warns) but that we should prohibit monopoly government. It is not that we should prevent taxation, it is that we should allocate our dividends from the commons we live in to the production of commons we prefer, and not to commons we do not.
As, furthermore, so called ‘privilege’ is precious information. It is information that informs you whose behavior you should imitate in order to gain discounts on opportunity costs. Privilege is as necessary to the human information system as is status, property rights, rule of law, money and interest.
Privilege, if it exists, is an inter-temporal store of value that informs others as to the behaviors that they should imitate in order to obtain a discount on opportunities. Manners and language are advertisements for one’s worthiness to engage in increasingly complex inter-temporal risks and returns.
Those who accumulate such behaviors obtain opportunity at the lowest discounts. Those that fail to adapt, and ask others to ’empathize’ with them, are seeking discounts without bearing the cost of adaptation.
In other words, they’re free riders participating in an act of fraud.
–“I don’t see how we can maximize our own exchanges in a given society if we don’t understand anyone in said society.”–
Of course.
I think you are caught up on a bit of language, and overlooking the epistemological argument I am making about the difference between seeking to impose a monopoly by law and justifying it, and seeking to develop many voluntary contracts while preventing theft.
We only learn the truth of anyone’s opinions by what they are willing to exchange. In other words, demonstrated preferences are truthful but articulated preferences are merely negotiating positions.
Understanding is a means of negotiating, not a means of establishing a monopoly definition of ‘good’ or ‘right’.
Source: Skye Stewart – “Hayek’s point about distributed knowledge applies…
PRIVILEGE (DISCOUNTS ON OPPORTUNITY COSTS) AS INFORMATION
—Hayek’s point about distributed knowledge applies to more than just economic issues. It also applies to social issues.—-
RE: http://ow.ly/Ln3uF
[W]hile, as I’ve written before, I agree with the general argument that women sense some things and men others (and progressives, libertarians and conservatives different things as well) I have a more complete theory of the inter-temporal division of perception, cognition, knowledge and labor (and one that eliminates equality, and monopoly decision making), there is a minor error in the logic of the first paragraph, and that is that it is irrelevant that we understand others – it is only relevant that we conduct exchanges with them.
Because their reaction to their senses are not accurate or ‘true’ in any meaningful sense other than as a reflection of the individual’s reproductive strategy – any more than any of the rest of our senses are all that accurate – they themselves are fragments.
This single insight is the principle cause of why democracy does not work, and the market does. The market allows us to cooperate on multitudinous means even if on disparate ends, with our successes and failures informing both us and others.
Whereas a monopoly government prevents us from learning anything of value, and the institutionalization of foolish policy by unexpriable law, and the accretion of bureaucratic self interests, prevents adaptation outside of catastrophic chains of failure.
In fact, monopoly government (monopoly production of commons by majority rule) promotes failure because it is precisely failed policy that permits the greatest rent seeking for all involved.
It is not that we should prohibit government (as Hayek warns) but that we should prohibit monopoly government. It is not that we should prevent taxation, it is that we should allocate our dividends from the commons we live in to the production of commons we prefer, and not to commons we do not.
As, furthermore, so called ‘privilege’ is precious information. It is information that informs you whose behavior you should imitate in order to gain discounts on opportunity costs. Privilege is as necessary to the human information system as is status, property rights, rule of law, money and interest.
Privilege, if it exists, is an inter-temporal store of value that informs others as to the behaviors that they should imitate in order to obtain a discount on opportunities. Manners and language are advertisements for one’s worthiness to engage in increasingly complex inter-temporal risks and returns.
Those who accumulate such behaviors obtain opportunity at the lowest discounts. Those that fail to adapt, and ask others to ’empathize’ with them, are seeking discounts without bearing the cost of adaptation.
In other words, they’re free riders participating in an act of fraud.
–“I don’t see how we can maximize our own exchanges in a given society if we don’t understand anyone in said society.”–
Of course.
I think you are caught up on a bit of language, and overlooking the epistemological argument I am making about the difference between seeking to impose a monopoly by law and justifying it, and seeking to develop many voluntary contracts while preventing theft.
We only learn the truth of anyone’s opinions by what they are willing to exchange. In other words, demonstrated preferences are truthful but articulated preferences are merely negotiating positions.
Understanding is a means of negotiating, not a means of establishing a monopoly definition of ‘good’ or ‘right’.
Source: Skye Stewart – “Hayek’s point about distributed knowledge applies…
http://www.businessinsider.com/putins-accused-of-poisoning-critic-2015-5PUTIN POISONS ANOTHER CRITIC
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-28 17:57:00 UTC
http://blogs.wsj.com/economics/2015/05/27/u-s-pay-inequality-is-growing-more-between-firms-than-within-them-paper-says/?mod=blogmodWHY ARE SOME FIRMS PAYING EVERYONE MORE AND OTHERS NOT?
(it’s not complicated)
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-28 17:52:00 UTC
In case you haven’t seen it yet.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-28 17:00:00 UTC
My view on the Clash of Civilizations
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-28 15:12:00 UTC
http://blog.jim.com/culture/taleb-refutes-pinker-on-war/Taleb vs Pinker.
Taleb is right.
I am even more right. 😉
That’s because violence is a nonsense measure. A self justifying selection bias.
Theft and parasitism are the full measure of predation.
Source date (UTC): 2015-05-28 10:50:00 UTC