Jan 10, 2020, 12:41 PM
Again: if parenting was that influential we couldn’t exist. Instead, parents primary control is ONLY who they mate with, and while you can’t make your kids ‘better’ you can do them harm. So in parenting, as in ethics, DO NO WRONG is far more important than trying to do right.
Because once they are in the real world they will always and everywhere revert to type – hence why your ancestors and mine sought to give them enough MANNERS to get prestige jobs young. This is how we ‘buy’ positions for our children. The half-life of your parenting is short.
Training in Hygiene, Dress, Manners, Diction, Active Listening, Vocabulary, Ethics, Morals, and especially the basics of lists, money, accounting, interest, and contract, help everyone. Because success is caused by conscientiousness (discipline) regardless of intellectual ability.
Let me say that again for clarity: Economic returns on intelligence are marginal and economic returns on behavioral training (manners, ethics, morals etc) are exponential. And the importance of Active Listening, Seeking To Understand, Hygiene, Grooming, Dress and Vocabulary, Weightlifting for men and Dancing for Women, and team sports for both cannot be overstated.
All those disciplines produce mindfulness. This is counter-intuitive to people but your stress in life is usually determined by your success at training yourself out of impulsivity through rituals, and training in Hygiene, Dress, Manners, Diction, Active Listening, Seeking to Understand, Vocabulary, Ethics, Morals, and especially the basics of list-making, money, accounting, interest, and contract, produce a calm mind far better and more productively than religion or therapy.
One’s natural Intellectual ability only grants access to complexity, and marginal increases in income, while conscientiousness and training (above) grant access to opportunity, success, and wealth. Getting kids into ‘good schools’ etc doesn’t improve them it filters them (buys them access).
That explains classes. (Uncomfortable truth warning) Different ethnic groups differ largely because of differences in neoteny(rate and depth of maturity) and as such sexual, social, and economic market value – more importantly in the short term, it affects ages for learning different skills.
This is why our education system ‘treating us as equal’ is a failure since the most neotenous (east Asians) can learn anything young at the cost of ‘topping out’ young, where less neotenous (Europeans) need more development, and least neotenous afro-Asiatic and Africans more physicality and socialization, before they can be relaxed enough for intellectualization – even so, the Asian method of combining group movements, recitation, and learning are disproportionately more effective than seated classroom work. And seated classroom work is far more effective with lots of slowly incremental rather than short steep increases in difficulty.
Girls aren’t ‘getting ahead’ of boys in mixed-gender, mixed-race schools – the schools are damaging boys development of physical movement, planning, and dominance play, making them care nothing about self others or society, and increasing psychosis in girls without a hierarchy of multiple ages to limit behavior and focus emotion on reciprocal training – and we are seeing it play out in all walks of life. Competition socializes.
So, tiger moms are buying children access to filters not improving their children (and we see this in the workforce over time). And by not TRAINING in the basics (manners ethics and aggressive competition) that matter most we are creating an infantilized emotional population unfit or not only military service, the workforce, but a political system we call democracy.