Category: Personal Reflections and Diary

(diary)(health update)

OK. So I have been back in the states for about six months staying with family and working on software, writing, and my health. It took about the first three months to get over the pneumonia or whatever it was that had been dogging me for a year. That took me until about mid January. By mid-march I started getting my strength back. Starting in mid April, on family and doctor’s advice, I’ve cut down my work day substantially to about six hours, slept more, and over the past two weeks, eaten more – and over the past week or so, I feel like I’m close to getting back on my feet. My skin looks much better. Wrinkles are going. My eyes look better. And ideas are flowing much better. And I’m not sucking on my adrenaline gland twenty hours a day.

If feels like I just need to get fit again now. And the fact that it sounds ‘enjoyable’ is probably evidence of my recovery. (Want to thank Megan for telling me I sounded ‘fragile’, which is what made me think that I needed to slow down if I wanted to recover faster. And so far it’s working. )

I am not sure how much of it’s the season, how much of it’s ditching the pneumonia, and how much of it’s just simple recovery. But I take about half my previous prescription and I feel fine.

(Well, to be honest I feel fine other than [RANT] the daily saturation in american (bullshit) news, television, marketing, advertising. And the daily reminder that this part of central connecticut, which, as territory on this earth, was once as glorious as west france and southern england, is continuing to follow detroit because of the concentration of dysgenics in combination with white flight to economic opportunity. I mean, I like the farmers on this side of the river. But the other side of the river, from Springfield MA, through Hartford to New Haven/Bridgeport, and then up to Danbury and Waterbury is basically a slum. And the Puerto Rican’s have destroyed Willimantic and New Britain as thoroughly as the blacks destroyed Hartford and New Haven (and Baltimore, and Detroit, and Cincinnati, and Oakland and…. You get the point. It’s sad. [/RANT] )

Anyway.

Slow progress on software, but progress. I can only work a few hours a day or i’m less effective than doing nothing. Great progress on philosophy in the first quarter without much effort Probably due to sleeping. Intro to courses script done. Working on the “what is philosophy” scripts. Working on Declaration and Constitution (which rocks). This balance seems possible for now. I assume that as usual, as I increase my fitness my work capacity will return.

I miss ukraine every day, and I miss it a lot. It hurts really.

Fell asleep listening to Hillary Putnam. Youtube on autoplay. Chomsky gets into the mix. I spend the whole F–king night dreaming I’m arguing with Chomsky and he won’t let me get a word in edgewise.

My version of hell.

( What’s on my mind? It’s sunny. I’m recalling slightly kinky daytime sex with an extremely hot woman on a balcony in the Astoria overlooking Rome. That’s what’s on my mind. Do you really wanna know what’s on my mind? Well, so, you know, there are sorta limits to sharing. )