Great question: Why did my marriages fail? 1st, because I was on planes, hotels,

Great question: Why did my marriages fail?
1st, because I was on planes, hotels, and traveling all the time – entirely my fault. Health collapsed. Also Lawyer said I “married beneath my station.” (4 yrs)
2nd, when I had cancer, especially the second time, I became a different person – and couldn’t make the lifestyle change necessary for me to both cope and keep her happy. (20 yrs). Had I been healthy we’d still be married. Still worship her today.
“Almost 3rd”, I couldn’t tolerate staying in Canada and she wouldn’t move. Had a necrotic gall bladder that spread to a liver infection, moved to the states for surgery, and given I almost died, that’s when I decided to sell everything, exit my company, and move to Europe – I’d assumed I wouldn’t live another year. I did. 😉 (4 yrs) Dodged a bullet on that one I think. 😉
3rd, even though we were close, it was a marriage of legal convenience and complicating factors and the relationship became a problem. Note there was another (very very gorgeous) woman vaguely involved as well, that didn’t help matters. But that wasn’t the cause. The causes were mostly our incompatibility, the revolution, and the fact that I’d been publicly “outed” by a prominent Kiev expat who somehow figured out my ‘mission’ in UA. So I needed to shift cities to continue that work. (18 months)

The reality is that in each case I became seriously ill from long periods of overwork and I crashed and burned physically – and autistics easily become detached (emotionally) and somewhat disassociative. In my case I’m sort of indistinguishable from a machine – which isn’t terribly good for relationships. 😉 I’m fine tho. 😉

Why tell these stories: because I might be an outlying case but living an ‘interesting’ life conducting national and international business, plus engaging in extra-political activity sounds exciting until you realize that for some of us our bodies (and our minds) can’t always carry the stress of it. In other words, don’t envy people with more ‘exciting’ lives. Once you have ‘enough’ money and enough of a career, to have reduced stress to the ordinary, nothing changes with more money and more responsibility, except the number and severity of stress points you face.

Hope that helps you or someone.
-CD

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